How To: Use a Phone (Toddler Styles)

By showing your Mum that the way she used phones is SO old school!

1. Toddler runs up to me and says "Mum, Phone!"
2. Assume the phone shape with hand (thumb to ear, pinky finger to mouth)
3. Start pushing the buttons on the dial of the phone (like a standard landline phone from the 80's/90's)
4. Toddler smiles and holds his hand in front of his face (palm facing)
5. Start pushing buttons, on the palm of the hand (making clucking/clicking noises)
6. Put palm of your hand up to your ear and side of your face (like todays modern cellphones and cordless phones)
7. Begin talking

When in the car driving to see your Aunty and Poppa

1. Hold hand in front of face (palm facing)
2. Start pushing buttons, on the palm of the hand (making clucking/clicking noises)
3. Put palm of your hand up to your ear and side of your face 
4. Start talking on the phone
5. Spend entire car ride to destination telling Aunty and Poppa that you're on the way and explaining the sites you are seeing e.g. "Hi Poppa, going bridge now! See you soon!"

When your nappy is being changed

1. Lie down
2. Have nappy taken off
3. Mum cleans up the mess and gets out new nappy
4. Mum asks Toddler if they want to put the baby powder on
5. Toddler puts his forefinger up in front of face (as if to say "Wait)
6. Toddler uses his "palm phone" to call his people to ask if he should put some baby powder or cream on for this nappy change
7. Toddler says "Ok, Powder. Bye!"
8. Toddler hangs up palm phone and holds his hand out for the baby powder
9. Hand Toddler baby powder and watch in amusement at the look of concentration while he puts it on
10. Take baby powder off Toddler and put away
11. Put new nappy on

When you're being read a bedtime story by Heavenly Aunty

1. Heavenly Aunty reading Toddler a bedtime story
2. Halfway through, Toddler picks up play phone (old cellphone of Mum's)
3. Heavenly Aunty stops reading while Toddler having their conversation
4. Toddler finishes conversation, looks at Heavenly Aunty as if to say "Carry on Minion"
5. Get rest of story read by Heavenly Aunty

When you want to play with the Christmas Train, but Mum said no

1. Toddler climbs up on the table to get Christmas Train controller
2. Take controller off Toddler
3. Remind Toddler "You only play with the Christmas Train when Daddy is here"
4. Take Toddler off the table and put on the floor
5. Toddler takes out his palm phone and calls Daddy
6. Toddler says "Daddy, Train. Ah huh!"
7. Toddler hangs up his palm phone and says "Daddy said Train ok Mum"
8. Toddler then goes to get controller again
9. Tell Toddler "Nice try, but Daddy needs to be here when you play"
10. Get "Aw Nuts" back from Toddler 
11. Toddler goes and plays with his cars